With Age Comes Wisdom

I have the awesome privilege to serve as a youth worker at our church. I just love teenagers because life is always on the move for them. One of the duties that I perform is to work as a small group leader with eighth grade girls. Now, I have to be honest. I prefer juniors and seniors because they are on the verge of jumping into the great big world and they are a bundle of emotions. Although I love them dearly, seventh and eighth graders seem to have had their brains sucked out by aliens. However, God has placed me with the younger girls and it is proving interesting.

First, I have to mention that I have two wonderful, beautiful young ladies who work with me in the small group. Casey and Carla are in their twenties and such a blessing. They are not only my Christian sisters but I love them both like daughters. I am proud to say that both recently recommitted themselves to Christ and followed through in believer’s baptism. They wanted this act to be a testimony to our eighth grade girls as well as the world.

Second, it is amazing what young teenage girls know these days. Unfortunately, they are bombarded with worldly ideas from sex to humanism. In our discussions, we talked about how we can share our faith in a lost world. Sadly, some of my girls are laughed at for their Christianity. A couple have shared that their teachers even make fun of Christians. How very sad. These young teens have so many questions and they are looking for wise answers. Some of the girls are on the brink of doing something big for Christ.

The Bible tells “older women” to mentor and guide the younger ones. We need to share our experiences with them. We need to listen carefully to what they are saying and then offer wise advice. Sometimes they just need to be encouraged and told they are doing the right thing in the midst of a dark world.

As I mentioned earlier I just had a big birthday. However, with age comes wisdom. From my personal stand point I sometimes wonder if I have learned anything besides becoming an expert of good chocolate. Then I realize I do have things I can share with my girls. I can share with them about God’s faithfulness. I can teach them to look for the good in people even those who hurt us. I can teach them to be a servant even when you are not recognized for it. I can let them know that God has a sense of humor and loves for us to laugh. I can encourage them to forget the world’s idea of beauty and seek God’s beauty.

So girlfriends, what has age taught you? What can you share with the younger women of your church that can help them in their spiritual journey?

The Next Fifty Years

The song “If I Could Save Time in a Bottle” plays in my mind today. Just a few years ago I was the young staff pastor’s wife and now I am the senior pastor’s wife. Now all my staff wives are younger than me. My children are adults and one is getting married in May. Some of my dear friends already have grandchildren. You see last week I celebrated a milestone birthday. I reached the “golden” age for life. Yep, that age where bulges appear, hot flashes occur, joints ache, and you get to have all kinds of medical test. Have you guessed my age? I am 50.

As I sat pondering the past 50 years wearing my new tiara and pink boa (another story for another day), I discovered a few things.
*First, life is precious. We get one chance to touch lives, so we need to make good use of our time.
*Second, cherish the time you have with your children. They grow up and leave home all too soon.
*Third, do not regret the goals you have not yet accomplished but keep on grasping for them. No, I have not written the great American novel but I have managed to keep a few journals for my sons.
*Fourth, you are only as old as you feel. Girlfriends, my youngest son, Bryan, recently wrote on his Facebook to another friend “my mom will never grow up.” Yes, I still love to hang out with teenagers, go to youth camps, and play hide and seek in the dark at retreats.
*Last, never, ever pass up a piece of chocolate!

So as I look forward to the next 50 years, here is what I hope God allows for me to accomplish:
*Travel the world.
*Spend time with my family, friends, and someday my grandchildren.
*Encourage ministers wives around the world to be a support to their husbands and not to give up when the times get tough.
*Write a book that makes people laugh.
*Live to be 100 (unless Jesus returns) and live life to its fullest.
*EAT MORE CHOCOLATE AND LAUGH EVERYDAY!

This is the Lord's Day

I just have to be open and honest about an issue I have. You may not be able to related but I believe as a minister’s wife you can stand up and testify with me. Just how many of you wish you could slap the alarm clock on Sunday mornings and go back to sleep? How many of you wish you could say “oh, I have so much to do and tomorrow I have to go back to work? What will it hurt if I stay home today?”

Okay girlfriends, I know at least once in your “staff wife career” that you have had these slightest thoughts and then pushed them out of your mind. I absolutely love being a pastor’s wife but there are some days (especially when I was working part time, had two children at home, and was going to college full time) that I just wanted to turn off the alarm and pull the covers over my head. I mean, some in our congregations do this every week, so why not us or even our husbands?

Well, I just cannot do it. This is the Lord’s Day. It’s the day we get to join in fellowship with believers and worship our Heavenly Father. It’s the day we can get spiritually filled up and renewed in order to face a dark, sinful world. Besides, God, our Lord and Savior, wants us to gather in His presence with fellow believers.

Now, I will be honest. There are days when I have dragged my children and myself into to church with a less than godly attitude. However, before the morning was over, I was blessed. On a day like today with the sun shining and the weather just perfect, I would have loved to spent time walking in the park or working the yard. However, I am truly blessed to have a church family that I love dearly and a Heavenly Father that loves me more than I will fully understand.

So confession time: As a staff wife, have you ever had the desire to stay at home on Sunday? I just need to know that I am not alone in this world.

A New Hat?

Now that Baby Piper is here, I need to begin to actively pray about where I need to be serving at church.. . . I know many of you see so many needs in your church's programs and congregations. You jump in and do whatever it is that needs to be done. . . You are Sunday School Teachers, Choir Singers, Nursery Workers, Secretaries, VBS Coordinators, - the list of the hats you wear in ministry are endless . . . 

• So my question today is this: How do you determine, especially with so many obvious needs, where it is that God desires you to serve?
  

I know that my first obligation in serving Christ is to serve my husband, then my daughters. I cannot serve in ministry in any capacity that would hinder my service to them. However, God has given me a spiritual gift that I must be a good steward of. I need to use it as well . . . This is what I am praying about right now. Where can I best use my spiritual gift without hurting my ministry to my family?

• Seeing, and recognizing a need -or being asked- doesn't necessarily mean that is where I am being "called" to serve. So another thing I need some advice on is: How do you say no?

Just because we are married to a minister doesn't make us capable of performing every task that needs to be done. I would guess that most of us, ministers' wives, are no longer piano players. We were called and ordained by God to be our husband's helpmate . .  not the church's _______ (fill in the blank). So, how do we help our husband in his ministry and faithfully be a good steward of the gifts that He has given us?

• There are so many things that we are busy doing. There are so many hats that we wear and so many titles that we carry around. Are there hats we need to take off? Is there another hat we need to put on?

What are some of the hats that you wear? How do you discern what God is telling you to do? I am praying and keeping my eyes open. I am waiting on Him. What about you?

Is There A Difference?

Ladies . . . 

I would really appreciate your opinion on something. 

Last night I was at my monthly bunco game with a group of ladies from one of our association's churches. The group was started for and primarily consists of ministers' wives from that church. None of us have ever served as pastor's wives, but all of them were fairly certain that "the rules" for pastor's wives were different than for ministers' wives. 

We all agreed that "the rules" varied on the size of the church, but I wasn't sure that the responsibilities of a minister's wife were all that different than a pastor's wife . . .

What do you think?

Changes

It is hard for me to believe that my little baby will be four weeks old this week. Everything about her and our family life still seems so new. Surely four weeks haven't gone by yet?! But, alas, the calendar doesn't lie. Time marches on. 

As if I needed another reminder of that fact, all I have to do is take a moment and watch my oldest daughter. I marvel at the fact that she will turn six next month . . . It seems like yesterday that she was the one I was rocking to sleep. 

There are a lot of things about my life that are very different from the last time I "blogged".  I have a lot more laundry to do. I am going without a lot of sleep. I am adjusting to a lot of change. 

I knew all this "change" was coming . . . but it is quite a different thing to actually adjust to it . . 

I was just thinking that all of us that are writers to this blog are undergoing some sort of change. We have all written about it at least once through the last year. Changing churches, changing families, changing jobs.  . . . 

Change itself is one of those things that never changes. Like death and taxes, change happens to all of us. It can be as simple as the menu dropping our favorite dish at restaurant that we frequent or as life altering as move to another state. 

I am so thankful that God is sovereign. He never changes and we can trust Him not only to be constant through our changes, but to be in control of orchestrating all these changes.  Yes, He changes things and allows these changes to take place for our good, but, dear sisters, He is doing so much more. The changes in our lives are not about us. Yes, God uses them to grow us, challenge us, even to "change" us, but . . . they are not about us. 

Change is all about God and His glory. 

All of us can, in our self-centered perspective, see how God has brought us good through all kinds of changes in our lives. We can cite how He has changed us, made us better people, better Christians, better minister's wives  . . . BUT, do we ever stop to see how we have brought Him glory in that process. . . What can our non-believing world learn about our God through our changes? Can they see that our lives aren't about us, but all about our God?

Maybe I am splitting a hair here. What do you think? Can you share an example of how God has been glorified through the changes in your life? How do you make sure that He gets the glory?

To be young again....

Our oldest daughter Wendy and her husband Kevin are in Seminary at Southeastern in Wake Forest, North Carolina. We are here visiting them this week. Over the last couple of years we have had several young couples from our church enroll here. So on Tuesday night we took all of them out to supper. As we sat around the table with all these young minds, discussing ministry, it was so much fun hearing their take on life. They are so enthusiastic about what God is doing, and is going to do with them. Some of them have plans to go into International Missions, others are aspiring to become Pastors and Youth Ministers while others would like to teach.

As I sat there listening, my mind went back to what seems like only yesterday, when it was Randy and I sitting around with "older" ministers discussing ministry. I remember vividly some of the conversations we had and how we were so excited about making a difference in the world AND in eternity.

As I do a little survey of what has taken place in our lives so far I realize that we have been involved in a lot of ministry. Just like you, we have seen people come to know the Lord, miracles happen, lives changed. It is still exciting to be a part of "God things".

But I have to say, that after supper the other night, I think God has chosen some really wonderful young people to carry on His work. I can't wait to see what they do....