Hello, everyone! My name is Tonya, and I am very pleased to be the new writer for The TN Prime Rib blog. Lana Rose invited me to become a part of the blogging team, and I am very excited about what the Lord will speak through me as I write to each of you. Blogging is new to me, but I feel that this is a calling from the Lord, since I love to write and to encourage others.
Since I am the “new kid on the block”, let me tell you a few things about myself. I live in Chattanooga, TN (born and raised there) with my husband of 18 years, Gerald O’Guinn. We have two daughters, Ashley is 15 and Arianna is 10. Also I have a stepdaughter, Deonna, who is 25 and lives in Flint Michigan, along with our little grandson, Dahnaven, who is 4.
The Lord led me and my husband to bring me out of the workplace in 1998 to be a stay-at-home mom to our daughter Ashley, who was 2 years old at the time. Other than becoming a Christian, and of course marrying my husband, that was one of the best decisions that I have ever made. Prior to that I worked for 13 years as a financial analyst for the Tennessee Valley Authority (TVA). I can honestly say that I have never had a moment’s regret about that decision; of course, it has meant some sacrifices, but it’s all been worth it. I cannot put a price on being a worker at home and taking care of the needs of my family.
Also, I have been a pastor’s wife for 7 years. My husband was a minister at a church for 7 years before he was called to our current church as the pastor……so I guess you can say I have been a ministry wife for 14 years. I have learned a lot over these years, and I will be sharing some insights of my journey in future blogs.
I really love the Lord, and I love His Word, so in the weeks and months ahead I will share with you some great verses from the Bible (they all are great!) that have touched my heart and hopefully will be an encouragement to you.
Again, I praise God who gave me this opportunity to write to you………..new friends, I am pleased to meet you!
1 Timothy 1:12 “I thank Christ Jesus our Lord, who has given me strength, that he considered me faithful, appointing me to his service.” (NIV)
Sunday, October 30, 2011
Friday, October 28, 2011
Lots of Blessings
- Opportunities to minister to others.
- Closer, deeper relationship with my husband.
- More intimate relationship with my friends who've experienced similar loss.
- Increased faith in God's provision and presence in my life.
- More appreciation for the precious gifts of both my healthy daughters.
- New and fresh insights into the truth of God's word.
I could go on and on about the many blessings that God has opened my eyes to through this experience.
Many have said that one day I will know "why". That may or may not be true on either side of heaven. I can say "why not me?" as easy as I can say "why me?".
Regardless, our God is sovereign. He is the giver and taker of life. He has given me Jesus and promised to never leave me or forsake me. That is enough.
If there were no lessons for me to learn, if my faith was already Paul-like in its consistency, if I would never be able to minister to another through this experience - His decision to take this baby was His decision. That is all that it needs to be.
Yet, He does teach me, use me and draw me closer to Himself. There I was in all my self-righteousness and pride, feeling like I had it altogether, like I had Him all figured out. I prayed for His way. I prayed for this child to be His. I prayed that His will be done.
It was. He did. He is. He will.
He heard my prayers. He raised my eyes back to Him to look full in His wonderful face. He gave me perspective as the things of this earth grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace.
He is so good. He is so good to me.
- Closer, deeper relationship with my husband.
- More intimate relationship with my friends who've experienced similar loss.
- Increased faith in God's provision and presence in my life.
- More appreciation for the precious gifts of both my healthy daughters.
- New and fresh insights into the truth of God's word.
I could go on and on about the many blessings that God has opened my eyes to through this experience.
Many have said that one day I will know "why". That may or may not be true on either side of heaven. I can say "why not me?" as easy as I can say "why me?".
Regardless, our God is sovereign. He is the giver and taker of life. He has given me Jesus and promised to never leave me or forsake me. That is enough.
If there were no lessons for me to learn, if my faith was already Paul-like in its consistency, if I would never be able to minister to another through this experience - His decision to take this baby was His decision. That is all that it needs to be.
Yet, He does teach me, use me and draw me closer to Himself. There I was in all my self-righteousness and pride, feeling like I had it altogether, like I had Him all figured out. I prayed for His way. I prayed for this child to be His. I prayed that His will be done.
It was. He did. He is. He will.
He heard my prayers. He raised my eyes back to Him to look full in His wonderful face. He gave me perspective as the things of this earth grow strangely dim in the light of His glory and grace.
He is so good. He is so good to me.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
More Unexpected Blessings
I am not sure why, although I could make some pretty good theories, but there are more ladies out there who have struggled through miscarriages in silence than I ever would have imagined.
The nurse practitioner at my doctor's office told me that 30% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage. I thought she was lying. That is nearly one third. Sure, a few of my girlfriends had experienced this loss, but 30%!?
As I have tried to be open and transparent about what I am learning/growing in Christ through this, I have had literally countless friends, acquaintances and virtual strangers confide that they too have experienced the pain that comes with miscarriage. The 30% number does not seem so crazy now.
It's these ladies whose words of encouragement have meant so much. They are indeed the ones that know what to and what not to say, when to and when not to say whatever should or should not be said.
An unknown number of our Christian sisters, church members and lost friends and family members have suffered in silence or are even now in pain. My reason for hashing all this out in such a public way is to make my self and my story available for God to use as He sees fit. Wally and I desire "our" story to be used to minister to these that are hurting and for God to be glorified in the process.
We so want others to be able to see that we do really believe all that we have said we believe - that God's promises of His goodness and mercy are just as real in the hard times as they are in the easy ones. So, we are refusing to put on our "church masks" and just "say" the right things, the things that everyone expects us to say. We need to be real, especially now, especially in our loss, in our sadness, in our hurt.
I am now a member of a new sorority, a new sisterhood. Just as I prayed that God would use me in my college sorority chapter, I am praying that God will use me in this one too. I have received many unexpected blessings already in this sisterhood. I am now so much closer to so many ladies- they have been a blessing to me. I pray that God will allow me that same privilege too.
The nurse practitioner at my doctor's office told me that 30% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage. I thought she was lying. That is nearly one third. Sure, a few of my girlfriends had experienced this loss, but 30%!?
As I have tried to be open and transparent about what I am learning/growing in Christ through this, I have had literally countless friends, acquaintances and virtual strangers confide that they too have experienced the pain that comes with miscarriage. The 30% number does not seem so crazy now.
It's these ladies whose words of encouragement have meant so much. They are indeed the ones that know what to and what not to say, when to and when not to say whatever should or should not be said.
An unknown number of our Christian sisters, church members and lost friends and family members have suffered in silence or are even now in pain. My reason for hashing all this out in such a public way is to make my self and my story available for God to use as He sees fit. Wally and I desire "our" story to be used to minister to these that are hurting and for God to be glorified in the process.
We so want others to be able to see that we do really believe all that we have said we believe - that God's promises of His goodness and mercy are just as real in the hard times as they are in the easy ones. So, we are refusing to put on our "church masks" and just "say" the right things, the things that everyone expects us to say. We need to be real, especially now, especially in our loss, in our sadness, in our hurt.
I am now a member of a new sorority, a new sisterhood. Just as I prayed that God would use me in my college sorority chapter, I am praying that God will use me in this one too. I have received many unexpected blessings already in this sisterhood. I am now so much closer to so many ladies- they have been a blessing to me. I pray that God will allow me that same privilege too.
Monday, October 24, 2011
A Different Blessing
In my mind I have started this blog a thousand times and a thousand different ways.
I was so looking forward to sharing my good news with you this week. I was excited about sharing the blessing that God had given us. By now, you've notice my use of past tense verbs, and are assuming that my news is no longer happy and the blessing is, well, different.
Yesterday I would have been nine weeks pregnant. Wally and I were excited to announce that Vinson Baby #3 was on its way. Then, last Monday began one of the longest weeks of my life. At nearly midnight, the OBGYN on call at Gateway Hospital here in Clarksville confirmed what we had spent the previous 24 hours fearing. The baby was gone.
Friends and family have stepped up and ministered to us. The church and the association, (where Wally works) are still patient and understanding. God has shown me numerous verses and has gently reminded me of His presence reassuring me that He is indeed in control.
Thankfully my body is healing, but my heart is still aching.
I walked through Wal-Mart Saturday afternoon and wondered how many other people were hurting on the inside as I was. I wondered how many others were walking around feeling as badly or even worse than me but were able to hide it even better than I could.
I have hope. I have Christ. I know the truth of God's word that makes my loss bearable. But how many are out there that don't have Him for their hope and don't know the truth of His word?
For awhile, I think I will have more patience with that complete stranger who seems so inconsiderate. Only God knows what is going on in her heart or in his life.
This is just one of the different, unexpected blessings I am experiencing this week.
I was so looking forward to sharing my good news with you this week. I was excited about sharing the blessing that God had given us. By now, you've notice my use of past tense verbs, and are assuming that my news is no longer happy and the blessing is, well, different.
Yesterday I would have been nine weeks pregnant. Wally and I were excited to announce that Vinson Baby #3 was on its way. Then, last Monday began one of the longest weeks of my life. At nearly midnight, the OBGYN on call at Gateway Hospital here in Clarksville confirmed what we had spent the previous 24 hours fearing. The baby was gone.
Friends and family have stepped up and ministered to us. The church and the association, (where Wally works) are still patient and understanding. God has shown me numerous verses and has gently reminded me of His presence reassuring me that He is indeed in control.
Thankfully my body is healing, but my heart is still aching.
I walked through Wal-Mart Saturday afternoon and wondered how many other people were hurting on the inside as I was. I wondered how many others were walking around feeling as badly or even worse than me but were able to hide it even better than I could.
I have hope. I have Christ. I know the truth of God's word that makes my loss bearable. But how many are out there that don't have Him for their hope and don't know the truth of His word?
For awhile, I think I will have more patience with that complete stranger who seems so inconsiderate. Only God knows what is going on in her heart or in his life.
This is just one of the different, unexpected blessings I am experiencing this week.
Friday, October 21, 2011
A New Place in Life's Journey
My brother and I are at the age where I will just call us
“Tweens.” No, it is not those couple of
years between childhood and teen years, but the years between having families
of our own and assisting our aging parents.
Since November of last year our parent’s health has deteriorated and our
mom is really struggling. We are forced
to juggle careers, our own family, and meet the needs of our parents.
Some of you may be walking through this time as well or you
have already gained your experience. I
can tell you that no one can prepare you for this period in your life. I struggle daily with being eight hours from
my parents. I wonder if they are eating
correctly, hearing the doctor’s correctly, etc.
There are many sleepless nights and even some tears. I mean, these are the same parents who wiped
my snotty nose and made sure I grew into a productive adult who loves
Jesus. Now, my brother and I are the
ones making regular trips to our parent’s home and assisting them with simple
task like shopping, cooking, cleaning, and caring for themselves. At this point my parents are refusing to
downsize to a smaller place or assisted living.
At least they have agreed to have someone come in once a month to
clean. Honestly, I am just so confused.
However, recently a dear friend who has been like a brother
to me since we were three years old shared his heart with me. He knows I blog for ministers wives and also
meet many of you through the various retreats and conferences. He sent me an email telling me how after much
prayer for me in the ministry I have and with the issues with my parents that
he feels I have a perfect platform to reach out to others, to share my
experience, and to offer hope. This
friend knows what it is like to go through this “tween” stage in life for he
lost his only brother, mother, and father just this year. He and his wife have been giving my brother
and me some advice that they learned and it is helping us deal with our
particular situation. What an
encouragement my friend has been as my family just begins the next life
journey.
And this stage in life is exactly a new journey. I am learning that God will walk with my
family as we handle our parents. God
loves my parents and so do we. God wants
the best for them and so do we. Girlfriends,
I am going to be brutally honest and say that I do not like to see my parents
or anyone suffer. What this journey is
teaching me right now is not to take our family (parents) for granted.
In the meantime, I will continue to make the eight hour
drive about once a month to attempt to meet some of their needs. I will have a supply of Peanut M & Ms in the car with me. But more importantly God will be walking with
me through this stage of life. One thing
I ask is that you pray for my family through this time, and if you have “been
there, done that,” please share encouragement and advice for me and other
ministers wives who may be in the middle of this journey. You never know who you might impact with your
comment.
God bless you all,
Vickie Lee
Monday, October 17, 2011
A Duh Moment
"Well duh, Vickie. Do you think God is trying to tell you something today." Those were my words as I finished my quiet time today. I use the Journey guide (Lifeway) and Jesus Calling by Sarah Young as tools for my quiet time. I was surprised how today's passage in both guides was from Luke 12:22-31. Apparently, God needed to hammer the message in my brain and heart.
I do have a lot on my plate and going on in my life that I am "concerned" about these days. Here is my list:
-my parent's health and decisions to be made
-upcoming wedding of my youngest son
-a job for my son; praise the Lord, his bride to be landed a good job
-home improvements that need to be done but lacking the funds
-friends who are without jobs
-spiritual revival for our church
-and many other decisions to be made
All of these "concerns" seem to be consuming my mind lately. Oh yes, I pray about them and will leave them for a bit a God's feet. However, later Satan slips in the doubt which multiples into worry. In the end I pick up these concerns again from God and try to handle them myself. This silly venture only leaves me eating chocolate by the handful, restless, tired, overwhelmed, and stressed. I am totally useless to anyone and most importantly not trusting God to handle any of them.
The Father has a plan for all my concerns (or in this case, worries). He knows my needs and my future. In the end I just need to rest secure in the fact that God already has everything answered in His will and that He has been working on it since the beginning of time.
I do have a lot on my plate and going on in my life that I am "concerned" about these days. Here is my list:
-my parent's health and decisions to be made
-upcoming wedding of my youngest son
-a job for my son; praise the Lord, his bride to be landed a good job
-home improvements that need to be done but lacking the funds
-friends who are without jobs
-spiritual revival for our church
-and many other decisions to be made
All of these "concerns" seem to be consuming my mind lately. Oh yes, I pray about them and will leave them for a bit a God's feet. However, later Satan slips in the doubt which multiples into worry. In the end I pick up these concerns again from God and try to handle them myself. This silly venture only leaves me eating chocolate by the handful, restless, tired, overwhelmed, and stressed. I am totally useless to anyone and most importantly not trusting God to handle any of them.
The Father has a plan for all my concerns (or in this case, worries). He knows my needs and my future. In the end I just need to rest secure in the fact that God already has everything answered in His will and that He has been working on it since the beginning of time.
Sunday, October 16, 2011
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