“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: “What! You too? I thought I was the only one.” C. S. Lewis
Recently, I had lunch with one of my new staff wives . However, while we were discussing where to have lunch, we both commented that we hated making decisions no matter how big or small. At the same time, we laughed and said, “What you too?” With the fact that we hate making decision and that we are both chocoholics, we can firmly say our friendship is sealed.
It does take time to forge a friendship especially when you are ministry. You must test the waters to see who can be trusted. You must spend some time with the person to decide if this relationship could be of mutual encouragement or a toxic one.
I cannot tell you how many times I have started investing in a friendship only to discover the person is simply using me to get the “inside scoop.” I have walked away from a very toxic friendship with a fellow pastor’s wife because she was draining me of my joy in ministry. Friendships should never seek to destroy or to get information for gossip. Friendships are to build one another up through the good times and the difficult times.
That is why I love it when I know a friendship is going to work out. As we get to know one another, the discussion often comes around to silly questions or things that we do. That is why I know my friendship is secure with my new staff wife. We HATE making decisions.
I would love to hear your “What! You too?” friendship story. As for my new friend, we did decide one thing at lunch today. We will let someone else tell us where to have lunch next time.