As I travel and share with many of you, I have found that there is often a common thread among the wives of minsters. At one time or another we enter a time of resentment. It can be a very short time or it can last a lifetime. A minister's wife has plenty to give, but saying one thing and feeling another will get you in emotional trouble.
I am going to share with you a few suggestions that will help you avoid those energy draining resentment builders. I gleaned these from a book called, "The Private Life of the Minister's Wife". My sweet husband gave it to me our first year of marriage.
Resentment Builders to Avoid
1. Being a message deliverer, thinking you are responsible for seeing that your husband does what is asked of him.
2. Always explaining your husband's or your own point of view as if it needed defending.
3. Being apologetic for your use of time or money.
4. Trying to fit into a mold others have made and always seeming not to measure up.
5. Listening to people who do not have or have not had your particular problem.
6. Expecting you to do (perform) before there has been time to find God's place for you.
7. Not making time for yourself.
These ideas are not a cure all, but they will help as you walk through your day. Take time to evaluate where you are. Allow God to teach and guide you. He has the perfect plan for you.
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Just a reminder that minister's wives can receive free life coaching through the TBC. As a minister's wife, I know how tough it can be when you feel like you can't talk to anyone. We give so much and sometimes it's nice to have someone who can encourage us as we try to figure out the next step in our own lives. Please remind the wives that we are here for them!
Thanks,
Shawnah Shingleton
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