A Poolside Lulu

Can summer be any busier? We have Vacation Bible School, church camps, mission trips, out-of-town guest, schools out and the kids are bored, vacations and an array of other activities but where is the time just to sit and relax. Where is a minister's wife to go for a break from the summer heat and hectic life?


Just a couple of days in to our Vacation Bible School week, two of my staff wives passed me in the church hallway and stated, "Lulu" and I just nodded and smiled. Other VBS volunteers overheard the comment and stared at us like we were speaking a foreign language. If you have not met me or read some of my post, you need to understand that "Lulu" is my fellow staff wives code for "I need a break!"


As I went home that day after VBS to look at my calendar to schedule our "Lulu" time, I grabbed a handful of Peanut M & Ms. Let me confess now that over the last couple of months I have gone through more large bags of Peanut M & Ms than I care to mention. I have even contemplated going to the more advanced super powered Almond M & Ms. I knew I seriously needed a "Lulu" with my sweet friends.


The following week Susan, Angie, and I were able to grab a couple of hours at my neighborhood pool. We brought along snacks (no chocolate because the heat would have melted it), sunscreen, water or sodas, and spirits that needed to be encouraged. Plus, we did not spend any money!


It was amazing how good it felt to just "be" with my sisters. I just love them. We can pour out hearts to one another and not worry about it being spred. What's amazing is that God always lets someone in our "Lulu" time provide a word of encouragement or wisdom. I just love that! The three of us left the pool that day lighter in spirit and a little tanner.


Girlfriends, I cannot stress enough the need for you to connect to other ministers wives who walk the same road as you do. You can find encouragement, share lessons you have learned, and do some laughing (the Father knows we need more of that in our lives).


If you do not have anyone that you can share with, send me a message. All it has to say is "Lulu" time needed!

Oreos

Members of our church are on missions in Iowa this week. Unfortunately, my life would not allow me to make the trip this year so I decide to be part of it another way. I asked our youth interns what type of snacks they would like for the trip and both stated Oreos. These two people are after my heart!


Well, I bought two big boxes of Oreos. Each box contained 30 individual packages with six cookies. I got home with them and wanted to do a little something else. I decided to type out sixteen of my favorite bible verses, copy them, and tape them to the packages of cookies. Okay, I thought that would take care of my part on the mission trip. However, my chocolate overloaded brain and God led me do a mini lesson regarding Oreos and I wanted to share it with you.


First, take a close look at Oreos. You will notice they are two very different colors yet when you take a bite the favors blend together to create a fabulous experience. When you go on missions or serve in a church, you sometimes meet people who are very different than you. You must learn to cross barriers-race, culture, socioeconomic, etc. You must be willing to cross the barrier no matter the cost and learn to love the people just as God loves us. In doing so you will receive blessings overflowing from the interaction God allows you to have with people who are different than you.


Second, Oreos are two very different textures. The outer layers are crunchy chocolate cookies that are held together by a creamy vanilla filling. When you go on missions, you travel and live with people who can be totally opposite than you. It is also true when you are in church ministry. Oh, you may attend the same church, go to the same school, come from the same race or socioeconomic backgrounds but you can still get on each other’s nerves. Just like the chocolate cookies of the Oreo has a common bond in they share the creamy vanilla filing, mission teams and Christian church members have a common bond. You have been saved by grace by a loving Savior, so you have the same Heavenly Father.


If you have a mission team going out this summer, let me encourage you to pray for them. If you cannot go with the team, I encourage you to provide a small treat for the team. It does not take much to let them know you are thinking of them. Hey, who knows! Maybe an Oreo can help lead a person to Jesus. As for being the wife of a minister, we can all enjoy a few Oreos in our day to remind us that all Jesus followers have commonality-we are saved by grace.

Oreos

Well, I bought two big boxes of Oreos. Each box contained 30 individual packages with six cookies. I got home with them and wanted to do a little something else. I decided to type out sixteen of my favorite bible verses, copy them, and tape them to the packages of cookies. Okay, I thought that would take care of my part on the mission trip. However, my chocolate overloaded brain and God led me do a mini lesson regarding Oreos and I wanted to share it with you.


First, take a close look at Oreos. You will notice they are two very different colors yet when you take a bite the favors blend together to create a fabulous experience. When you go on missions or serve in a church, you sometimes meet people who are very different than you. You must learn to cross barriers-race, culture, socioeconomic, etc. You must be willing to cross the barrier no matter the cost and learn to love the people just as God loves us. In doing so you will receive blessings overflowing from the interaction God allows you to have with people who are different than you.


Second, Oreos are two very different textures. The outer layers are crunchy chocolate cookies that are held together by a creamy vanilla filling. When you go on missions, you travel and live with people who can be totally opposite than you. It is also true when you are in church ministry. Oh, you may attend the same church, go to the same school, come from the same race or socioeconomic backgrounds but you can still get on each other's nerves. Just like the chocolate cookies of the Oreo has a common bond in they share the creamy vanilla filing, mission teams and Christian church members have a common bond. You have been saved by grace by a loving Savior, so you have the same Heavenly Father.


If you have a mission team going out this summer, let me encourage you to pray for them. If you cannot go with the team, I encourage you to provide a small treat for the team. It does not take much to let them know you are thinking of them. Hey, who knows! Maybe an Oreo can help lead a person to Jesus. As for being the wife of a minister, we can all enjoy a few Oreos in our day to remind us that all Jesus followers have commonality-we are saved by grace.

Summer Memories

I have some of the best summer memories from when I was a kid. I loved spending a week at my grandparents, fishing, gardening, staying up late, and eating s'mores.

This week, my oldest, Riley is spending with her grammie in Ohio. They are swimming, visiting museums, riding amusement park rides, spending time with cousins and having a fantastic time.

As a result, my house has been much, much quieter. It really is amazing how much an eight year old girl can talk!

I am glad that she is up there making her own summer memories. She is always wanting me to tell her stories from my memories. I told her that she was making the memories that she would one day tell as stories to her children, if the Lord wills. I want her to take mental snapshots and really savor this special time she is spending with her Ohio family.

It is so easy to wish away days, to long for cooler temps or a less busy time of year. Let me encourage you to treasure each day as the blessing that it is. God's word reminds us that He hasn't promised us tomorrow. So, there is nothing wrong with taking time savor today. Truly take time this summer to live each day, counting your blessings by taking your own mental snapshots and making your own summer memories.

What do you want to remember about this summer? What do you want to remember about today?

Summer Mistakes

I remember a time growing up that I actually thought one day I would arrive at this Christianity thing. I thought I'd be able to stop my habitual sins and never commit a sin of omission either. I mean all those deacons, Sunday school teachers and ministers at my church seemed to always have it together, so I assumed that one day I would too.

Honestly, it wasn't until I was in college and living with a minister's family that God revealed to me the truth; sanctification is a process. Oh, glorification WILL come (Amen!?), but for now, God still has to teach me some things.

I wish the process was easier. I wish I still didn't mess up so often. I wish I still didn't struggle with the same sins over and over again.

But I trust in God's Divine wisdom in this process. I know this is how He is most glorified in me. I do not doubt His sovereignty and acknowledge this discipline is a sign of my authentic relationship with Him as His daughter.

All this to explain that I blew it yesterday. Yep, I allowed my tongue to get the better of me once again. In a meeting, in front of others that I wanted to set a good example for, I am sure I lost some respect and credibility. Sigh.

My husband patiently listened to my confession and then shared some wisdom. He encouraged me by reminding me the importance of letting people see my failures. I do want these ladies to believe my faith is authentic. They need to see me fall. They need to see Jesus work and transform me. They need to hear me apologize and confess my sin. Only then will they truly listen to and learn from my walk with our Savior.

My prayer is for us as ministers' wives to live out our faith in an authentic manner. Maybe we do need to be taken off the pedestals that our congregations have placed us on. Maybe they need to hear us say, "I was wrong" and "Forgive me for _____." Maybe then our congregations will be more transparent and real with each other. Maybe then God will be able to use our authenticity to reach our communities.

I didn't mean for my blogs this time around to be a confession time, but who knows how God will redeem my mistakes for His glory? Do you have an example of how God has used your mistakes to glorify Himself? Please pass the truth on by commenting.

Summer Motivations

Like many of your summer calendar's, my month of June became really full really fast. And like many of your calendars, the church calendar and my own look strikingly similar.

I have often -honesty alert- resented that fact: that the church seemed to dictate my calendar. Every other member got to decide which events to attend and which activities they felt led to volunteer for. But, being a minister's wife, those luxuries weren't mine. I was expected not only to be there, and to volunteer, but also to lead and plan and know what was going on. As result my attitude was often lousy, but I would put on my best "church face" and fake it.

This summer my room was decorated and the lesson planned for the first day of VBS when I opened my Bible for my quiet time that first morning. I read in Psalms how privileged I was to get to tell the next generation about our God. I was instantly convicted and excited about my opportunity that day. No, my heart had not been in the right place, and I had not even realized it, but God still wanted to use me.

In my quiet time on the last day of VBS I read another Psalm that spoke of "generations." It was a reminder that God is faithful to all generations and that His faithfulness is an enduring one. I am thankful that He continues to be faithful to me especially when my heart is far from Him.

So let me encourage you as you face your summer calendar this year to take a moment and check your motivations. Make sure you are serving out of a pure heart and. remember that nothing on your calendar will come to pass if it isn't in God's sovereign hands. He has a purpose for you this summer and His plans are higher, better than our own.

When a Church Member Leaves

A “given” in ministry, is that church members will leave our churches. For me, it is so very difficult. I hate to see them go!! Doubt sets in….”but Lord, they are soooo awesome with the children.” Or, “What will the music ministry do without them?” Then, if I am not careful, I begin to worry and have vain imaginations…."what did we do wrong?" "Is it my husband’s fault?" "My fault?" "What could we have done differently?"

There are many reasons why people leave our churches. Moving to another city or state. Dissatisfied with something or someone. Disappointed with something or someone. God leading them to another ministry. Some are sin driven—others are God driven.

There are also many “ways” people leave…some leave without a word, they just simply disappear. Others leave burning all bridges behind them. Some want to be Godly in the way they leave….others seem to want to cause hurt and division.

Why is it so hard for me? Is it hard for you? I get that yucky feeling in my stomach and can get down and discouraged and depressed. How am I to respond? With prayer. With faith. With love.

God builds the church. Not us. Not our husbands. Not our denomination. God! I love to see how God, in His timing, will bring in new people whose gifts will fill in the places that people have left. It is beautiful to watch and see how the Lord brings in new people who love children’s ministry and/or who are gifted in worship.

The church is His Body. His Bride. He died for the church. He loves the church.

Oh, Father, help me to trust you and not allow the enemy to defeat me when people leave our church.

Never Give Up!!

You know what it is like to pour yourself into someone’s life...

I spent hours and hours with her…..listening to her. Weeks pouring God into her. Months pouring myself into her. Pouring Truth into her. Hearing her sinful story and the way satan has twisted her mind and will has brought me to many tears and agonizing and to be honest….many times fear and frustration.

Then a breakthrough!! During the altar call after my husband taught on temptation she finds me with tears rolling down her face asking me to go with her to the altar and pray with her. And go I did!! I was rejoicing that she was finally letting all of the sin that was so easily entangling her and she would be cut with holy scissors and set free from all of that bondage. The altar was wet with our tears and I am pretty sure the people were tired of singing the same verses over and over but we did not care! God was at work! Finally she “got” it!!

Or at least I thought. No sooner had she released and repented….the enemy began his ugly work again. She began to struggle again and I was in tears!! Fearful. Frustrated. Questioning. What will happen?

Ministry can be so hard. We often do not see instant results….but often we do!! NEVER forget that God is at work behind the scenes…we may not see any progress and discouragement can set in…but KNOW He is at work!!! Be encouraged. “your toil is not in vain in the Lord!!”

Never give up!!

An Awesome God

Our family just returned a week ago from a trip Las Vegas. No, we did not gamble nor were we even tempted. Instead we visited our son and daughter-in-love who are stationed at one of the Air Force Bases there. It was great just spending time together and enjoying the stark beauty of this desert area.


One late evening a few of us drove up snow capped Mount Charleston where the temperature literally dropped nearly 35 degrees from the city. Another afternoon we traveled to The Valley of the Fire State Park where the starkness of the desert turns to rolling hills and glorious red rock formations jut from the earth. We were reminded that God’s own hand formed this land and we were viewing the crevices of His palm prints. Also, because Stephen is over the security of one of the bases, he set up a demonstration of the military dogs and their handlers. Let’s just say you do not want to reach out and pet one of these trained attack dogs.


However, one interesting side trips was to visit the famous Vegas strip. Our youngest son, Bryan, was with us and his Baptist Collegiate group from college had done a mission trip a couple of years earlier down on the strip. Needless to say, he became our strip tour guide. He quickly walked us through Caesar’s Place and we watched the fountain show in front of the Bellagio. As we are gawking at the sights, Bryan instructed all of us follow him because he had a surprise for me.



We pounded the pavement for several blocks and walked across a bridge to the opposite side of the street. Walking next me, Bryan leaned over and said, “Mom, your surprise is straight ahead.” Okay, I am thinking maybe I was going to see a statue of Elvis (yes, I am/was a fan). Suddenly, Bryan stops, smiles, points to a building and stated, “Here we are. This is your surprise.” Looking up I see these words in bright bold colors: M & M World. Girlfriends, I am not kidding it was a four story building completely dedicated to my favorite fun candy! I entered and all I could get out the entire time was, “Oh wow!” Then he led me to the second floor and to the back of the store. There before my amazed eyes was a wall from floor to ceiling with large tubes filled with every hue and favor of M & M possible. I went into total and complete shock. My family just laughed and guided me through the rest of the building. I do remember taking pictures but after I reached the car, I realized that I had not bought anything.



Well, I tell you all of this to say that God provides joy in many things. He gives us nature to remind us His creative side. He provides laughter of friends and family to sooth our souls. Starry nights shout His glory. He even provides M & M World for one of his little princesses here on earth. What an awesome God we serve!

Welcoming a New Sister

Chocolate covered raisins, Peanut M & Ms and a Diet Coke. That is what my dear friend, Michele, asked me to bring a couple of weeks ago when I traveled to Arkansas for her daughter’s wedding. You may laugh at the requested but the combination of the three screamed, “I need your presence here to provide support, laughter, and share in my joy.” So as any good girlfriend would do, I placed the items in a gift bag along with a package of tissue and a pack of gum, and headed west. I would have attended the wedding without the request from my friend because her daughter, Jennifer, was marrying the love of her life and entering our very unique world.


Jennifer is now one of us. She is in the sisterhood of minister wives. Her life will be an open book for all to see and unfortunately at times to criticize. Jennifer is fortunate in that her mother-in-law is a pastor’s wife and can be a support and encouragement to her. However, since I have watched Jennifer grow into a beautiful young woman, I was able to share a special few minutes giving “Aunt Vickie” advice.


*Realize you are God’s child first and spend time with Him daily.
*You are Taylor’s wife second so take care of him.
*Take care of yourself. Find time to rest, to renew, and to restore.
*Serve your church, but be willing to say no so you do not overload yourself.
*Laugh and laugh a lot!
*Be real. Let your church family see your family as real people.
*Although you want to save the world, realize that many lost people do not want to be saved.
*Realize that ministry is not always going to be pretty. Sometimes you have to go through valleys filled with mud and muck to grow on the mountaintops.
*Find a support group of ministers wives who walk on the same path as you.
*Do not be afraid to have a best friend (her mom, Michele, has been my best friend for years and she is not a ministers wife!)
*If your nerves get frazzled, try Peanut M & Ms. They are less expensive than Prozac.
*And again . . . laugh a lot.


So ladies, what advice would you give a new sister to the ministry? Jennifer will be reading this blog so I hope that you will not be afraid to post some comments for her to read.

Be Blessed!