Parenting and Discipling

I was blessed this August with the opportunity to attend the ERLC National Convention in Nashville. The theme was "Christ Centered Parenting in a Complex World."

Speaker after speaker shared Bible-based theology and applicable advice for the sanctifying process of parenting. The last discussion panel of the event was even addressed to those of us raising "preacher's kids."

Now, it is October and I could look back over my notes and share bits and portions of the quotes and tips I hurriedly scribbled down, not wanting to miss the next one. But, instead I want to share two things that I wish the Convention had done a better job communicating.

First, I didn't notice this at first, but when it was brought to my attention, I couldn't help but moan a little inside each time a speaker referenced this aspect of parenting...

In our group was the sweetest engaged couple. Now, I know I am a little biased as I have known the groom for nearly his entire life and I have treasured the relationship God has given me in his bride. Because these two lovebirds are yet to be parents, they approached the theme of the conference from a different place. Over and over again they heard how hard and difficult and challenging it was to be parents. We all laughed a little about it when they pointed out how the speakers were making it hard for them to WANT to become parents. Yet, they were right. There was little balance in the topics and discussions about the joys parenthood.

Don't get me wrong. As a parent of a high school teen, a grade school kid and a pre-school rug rat - I know parenting is often hard and difficult and challenging. But I also know that parenting is often fun and fulfilling and amazing.

As a parent, I play and learn and see the world through the fresh eyes of younger people. I don't "have" to, but I "get" to experience life and grow in Christ through three individuals whom God has temporarily entrusted to my care. It is an experience and blessing like none other.

This leads me to my second observation.

There were others in our group from the church that weren't parents yet. For whatever reason, God has not filled their homes with the pitter-patter of little feet. Some in our group only hear that sound when the grandkids are visiting. The organizers of the conference provided some encouragement in that role, yet I think they neglected another role that as Christians we are all called to -

"Parenting" those who are younger than we are in the faith. I believe Jesus referred to it as discipling.

As parents to our three daughters, my husband and I pray and desire nothing more than for each of "our" girls to have thriving, growing relationships with Christ. Yes, we work hard to provide and want to raise responsible adults- but, as the conference speakers reiterated over and over again, our role as parents has deeper, spiritual, eternal consequences to consider.

As Christians called to "make disciples" and to "teach them to observe all" that He commanded- we have the commission to love on and "parent" other believers. Not in condescending manners, but in humility with grace...

Doing life together, our daughters get to see and know the "real" people that their parents are. The discipling relationships we have with them can be a model for how we as believers can seek out and intentionally disciple others.

Whether in our churches or work places, in our friendships and acquaintances, we can intentionally seek out the intimacy and transparency that would allow us the influence to speak Christ into others and allow them to speak Him into us as well.

These types of relationships are often messy. Like parenting, they can be hard and difficult and challenging, BUT, they can also be fun and fulfilling and amazing. God can use them to grow us as much, if not more so, than those we disciple.

Remember, even though The Great Commission is a command, it is another "get to" not a "have to." It is God's blessing to us, to use us this way.

So, whether we are in the throws of any life-stage of parenting or grandparent-ing OR we are simply serving Christ, we should all have and be developing an active Paul/Timothy mindset, nurturing a spiritual "little" believer in the faith....

Don't get me wrong. I loved the conference. I gained both theological perspective and practical tips that I have implemented into our family life. It just didn't end there.