Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another,
'What! You too? I thought I was the only one. ~ C.S. Lewis
When I ran
across this statement by C. S. Lewis, I immediately loved it. I cannot tell you how many times the start of
a friendship for me has begun with me jokingly saying, “M & Ms are my nerve
pills” or “chocolate is a major food group for me.” Inevitably, the comment back is “Me
too!” That’s when I know I have a true
soul sister who shares my love of chocolate.
However, there
are times as a minister’s wife that the comment of “I thought I was the only
one” arises. For ministers’ wives we are
often isolated from our church congregations.
Oh, we have friends but sometimes they are “arm-length” friends. Very seldom can we fully open ourselves up to
a friend in our congregation.
Friendships are
truly born. They have a life of their
own. They develop over time as long as
we nurture them. I have found that
sometimes a friend does not have to say anything. All she has to do is sit beside you and hold
your hand. That is true friendship.
When we are able
to share openly with a sister in ministry we can get rid of stress. We can learn that we are not “the only one”
who struggles with certain issues like loneliness, jealously, sharing our
husbands, criticism, etc. Having a
friend to share with can allow us some peace and freedom. While one sister is struggling the other
sister can encourage and be understanding.
However, never ever let the struggling sister stay rooted in her misery. Show her the positive.
I am only
beginning to form friendships with the staff wives at my new church. We are beginning to connect as we learn
things about each other. There have been
several “What! You too?” moments
followed with laughter. I find great
comfort in knowing that I am not alone in this thing called ministry.
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