Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Faith, Family and Friends

There is something strange about grief. It is a time that you just go on automatic pilot. For the last two weeks I have not really been able to function like I should. Nothing seems to be important and I am living in a fog. I will be doing okay one minute and then suddenly I am washed over with a flood of tears and emotions.

I think I am having a hard time comprehending all of this. My mom was never "seriously" ill. My dad had been sick off and on for years and we saw it coming. As a matter of fact we were all standing around his bed, with him perfectly lucid, as he gave us his blessing and told us how much he loved us. When he was finished with each one of us, he looked at my mom, told her how much he loved her, closed his eyes and went to glory. But Mama had only been in ICU less than 12 hours. But before I could get use to the idea of her being critically ill - she was gone. Then there were all the details of planning the funeral, then we had the wake and receiving of friends and then on Thursday the funeral. If that wasn't enough for my emotions to handle, Friday all of the children met at her place and went through all of her belongings, remembering each item, laughing and crying at the same time. There were trinkets to sort through, jewelry to be divided up, furniture to be decided on, papers to sort and pictures to go through. And in a matter of hours what took this sweet lady a lifetime to accumulate, was packed in various boxes and we were through. Now all we have are memories.

This has all made me stop and think of how my girls will remember me. What will they say at my funeral and what will they talk about as they sift through my things? My prayer is that they will remember that I loved the Lord and tried to do what He wanted me to do in the lives of the people He allowed my path to cross.

Years ago I heard someone say that at the end of your life all that will matter will be your faith, family and friends. That is such a true statement. Have you thought much about what you are leaving behind????

1 comment:

Dana said...

Loosing a mom is very difficult. Thank you for giving us the opportunity to pray for you as you "cast your cares upon Him because He cares for you". What a blessing that you had a Godly mother and father...can you see her as she is sitting in her chair or on her couch reading the Word to you as a little girl? Can you see her now falling before the throne....